Friday, June 4, 2010
A Letter to DirecTV
It's been four months now without you and we are doing just fine. We didn't even have withdrawals from you like we thought we would! The only thing we've missed a little bit is Fox News, and that's usually depressing anyway, so we're still okay. And the extra fifty bucks in our bank account is super sweet.
So please tell your customer service people to stop calling us. Tell them to believe us when we say we haven't switched to another provider. That we discontinued our service with you because we simply don't want television service in our home. I'm pretty sure that one lady swallowed her gum when I told her that. Oops. She sort of choked up and started laughing rather hysterically if you ask me. Apparently she doesn't hear that often.
To be honest, we are just plain tired of your cursing, your vulgar language, immodesty and nudity, your dysfunctional families, your homosexuality promoting, God-hating programs.
Please believe us when we say we want more time for our family, for our marriage, and for God. Please don't try to entice us with free service or premium channels like HBO and Showtime. They have more filthiness than the other stuff, so why would we want that?
I know it sounds crazy to not have television service, but we're crazy like that. Rebels, living life on the edge. The edge without TV.
Again, I repeat, please stop calling us. You've called three times now and each time you've received the same answer. We are satisfied without you. You are wasting your time. Kindof like we were wasting ours.
A now satisfied use-to-be customer
Labels: Christian Living